this post was submitted on 20 Jan 2024
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Casual UK

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I work in a warehouse surrounded by Europeans. What are some British insults I can teach them? (feddit.uk)
submitted 8 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
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I've already ran the gamut on jokes about Dicks.

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[–] LifeCoffeeGaming 8 points 8 months ago

Wanker is solid. Ballbag, a personal favourite Bellend, but you may have that already. Shitebag, Scottish one Useless as a chocolate teapot

[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I was in Malaysia once and a got chatting to a guy who didn't have the best English. He asked me for another way to say "I'm only joking" and I taught him to say "I'm only having a giraffe", which he managed in broken English ("Having a jee raff") I hope one day he says that to an Englishman and confuses him thoroughly.

[–] davepleasebehave 4 points 8 months ago

I'm having a Steffi. I'm having a bubble.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago

Fuckwit is a traditional insult that I have found is often quickly taken into new arrivals hearts. My guess is, this is because it unites two words with very old IndoEuropean roots.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago

My personal favourite is "blithering idiot".

[–] cynar 4 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Introduce them to the Muppets.

The use of "You Muppet(s)!" is one of my favourites.

(It effectively means "Adorable/endearing idiot")

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago

I feel like if Peter Capaldi called me a Muppet I would not take it as "adorable" and more like "twat".

[–] wiccan2 4 points 8 months ago

Numpty, plonker, twat, div, pratt

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Smeghead Or cockwomble.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago

"Cockwomble" definitely gives off the impression of having looked up how to sound like a Brit on the internet! Big fan of smeghead though.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago

do these count

[–] cashews_best_nut 2 points 8 months ago
  • Spanner - idiot
  • Weapon - idiot
  • Muppet - idiot
  • Nesh - wimp/soft
  • Snide - Nasty/Evil/Cunt