this post was submitted on 05 Jul 2023
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Asklemmy

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It is not the matter of what if you are found. It's the matter of when.

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[โ€“] MassKirbycide 33 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Head for The Continental Hotel and hope the rules hold up.

[โ€“] [email protected] 14 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

They probably wouldn't. Didn't the woman in the first one break the rules for a bit over 1 million?

In general the actual dollar amounts in the John wick universe always seemed low to me. I always thought they should have used the gold coins more, since their value was more ambiguous

[โ€“] [email protected] 30 points 2 years ago
[โ€“] grabyourmotherskeys 29 points 2 years ago

Post a dating profile with my full information including full HD photos. This will ensure noone contacts me.

[โ€“] [email protected] 26 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I'd give my kid a gun and tell him to collect and feel no regret about it. Fuck it, I'm dead anyway, might as well leave a legacy.

[โ€“] [email protected] 9 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Lifelong mental trauma as legacy

[โ€“] [email protected] 11 points 2 years ago

At least he'd be able to afford really good therapists.

[โ€“] Hendiballs 16 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Start singing I'm Gonna Be by The Proclaimers. Anyone who gets too close will just get sucked into it

[โ€“] [email protected] 4 points 2 years ago

Alter my appearance as much as possible, as many times as possible. Live on cash. Move location as much as possible, I'll aim to live in my car if I can. Alter my number plate regularly. Get rid of my phone. Live phoneless.

If I'm able I'd also get a gun and a fake ID but not sure if that would be realistic- I wouldn't know where to seek this.

But eventually money will run out. I don't think I would last longer than my savings though. I'd be lucky to live a month.

[โ€“] [email protected] 2 points 2 years ago

When I wake up...

[โ€“] [email protected] 15 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I'd let my kids collect the bounty.

[โ€“] barrage4u 2 points 2 years ago

I like this

[โ€“] thebestaquaman 13 points 2 years ago

I'm currently close to an uninhabited mountain region: Imma run and hide!

[โ€“] Tabboo 9 points 2 years ago

Eat beans and carry a cigarette lighter.

[โ€“] [email protected] 8 points 2 years ago

Unless I am given some kind of kickstart of funds/tools/abilities, I'd be dead pretty fucking fast. :(

[โ€“] [email protected] 7 points 2 years ago

Something with that snail, probably.

[โ€“] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago

Fake my death, Collect the paycheck, Settle in Hawaii or something.

[โ€“] [email protected] 6 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Perhaps some billionaire would adopt you and make a game out of defending you :P

[โ€“] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago (1 children)

They could build a little comfortable environment for you to live.

Then show you off to their friends as the billion dollar bounty guy.

Reminds me of the Star Trek TNG ep where that collector guy captures Data.

[โ€“] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago

I was going more in the direction that they are psychos that use you as bait so they can kill whoever dares step on their property ๐Ÿ˜‚

It would probably be illegal to say "i have a billion dollars just lying around here, come and take it" and then shoot people, not so much if you coincidentally let slip that you house the billion dollar guy.

[โ€“] [email protected] 5 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Kill myself to deny anyone the prize

[โ€“] [email protected] 1 points 2 years ago (1 children)

The person to find you could easily claim the bounty. Not like you can contest it....

[โ€“] [email protected] 3 points 2 years ago

Not if he jumps into an active volcano

[โ€“] sausagemeatus 2 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[โ€“] GalacticBagelHole 1 points 2 years ago

Tonight, ~~Gherman~~ sausagemeatus joins the hunt.

[โ€“] barrage4u 1 points 2 years ago

In a way this is how billionares live

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