this post was submitted on 05 Jul 2023
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/c/Vent: Vent about your life here

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We've been together for 3 years. To give some context, I'm currently in extreme financial struggles that I realistically can't hold a relationship of this type anymore.

We live in different cities. 6-hrs drive apart. Basically she only likes me for money, and sadly I wouldn't have a problem with that if she reciprocated the giving and care back. It's not a sugar-daddy relationship and was never meant to be. We're the same age and supposed to care about each other in every way and not like this.
It sucks when someone only values you as an ATM and ignores every side of your personality and every other kind of support you can provide: Self improvement, self worth, self image and value, health care, emotional, future planning, respect, protection, and all the worrying and care which I give to her more than I do for myself. I emptied my bank account for her and she still wouldn't care for me because it's not enough. Constant gifts for her, her friends, her family, rent, hospital bills, all sort of bills, fancy restaurants, flight ticket and hotel bookings (for her only not both of us), resorts, medical therapy, ... I gave her everything she wished for that I could afford. I let her have the nice things while I still live poorly and have bad ones. All I asked for return is care and time of her day. I'm not talking every day, No; She wouldn't even see me for few hours every month. The last month was the breaking point for me, I spent over $10K on various things for her, and then we decided that I would come to sit with her and she replied with "I can only stay with for 3 hours, then I have to do other things and meet other people." So I asked her to choose a date when she is not very busy and can see me for few more hours at least, and she still wouldn't do that. So I said, "ok no hard feelings, but I'm canceling my trip and all the gifts I was going to bring with me. Maybe we can sort another day in the future." After that she got angry and cussed at me and said to never see, text or call her again in life.

From my perspective: I do not want to waste so many hours and money to see her for 3 hours. I feel bad about myself and I don't feel desired or cared about. I started to hate this shit of relationship we have where I constantly give my all and everything to someone who doesn't give back anything.

From her perspective: I'm not good enough and I don't care about her.

In the end, I tried my best and didn't mistreat her once. I really wish her the best but would not want to apologize and restart things with her again.

Thank you for the vent and please feel free to share your opinions. I will respect them and try to understand them regardless.

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[โ€“] randomTingler 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I understand that you are the least priority for her. If she can't spend 3 hours with you what is in there?

Just go ahead with your life, you will find a better person. She is not worth for you.

[โ€“] answersplease77 2 points 1 year ago

Thank you. Realising how I am her least priority is very accurate and I've always felt like shit because of it. I drive 12 hrs, prepare, and spend thousands on gifts and she doesn't like me to stay for more than 3-4 hours every month. She did that multiple times. I'm better off moving on to someone who likes for others what they like for themselves