this post was submitted on 28 Apr 2024
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have you tried having these conversations?
they don't go so well IRL than they do in your head. the conservation you want in your head requires two willing and thoughtful parties... often there is only one person with that mindset... or sometimes none.
I had at trans friend who I did talk about this stuff with a few years ago... but now they are a radicalized nutcase and they are more focused on being 'pronoun' police and making every topic about 'their suffering' etc. oftentimes sane people become crazy people.
I'm going to ignore the bit about your friend for now.
I have had the kind of conversation where you try to change someone's mind. That is, distinct from the more common kind on the Internet where you're just fighting.
It takes a lot of time and energy. You need them to see you as a member of one of their in groups, typically.
I have had a couple friends who would consume a lot of right wing media, but we shared some things in common. One was also working retail, both were video game nerds. I think because we had those things in common, they saw me as a friend, someone in an in-group, and thus listened to me.
If I had just sent them a YouTube video, they probably would have rejected it. If a stranger did, almost certainly.
Unfortunately, when I was no longer in their daily life they sort of drifted back to what their dominant groups thought.