ADHD

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128

I don't feel rewarded for anything "good" I do (self.adhd)

submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by Binette to c/adhd

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Hi everyone.

When I try to follow a schedule to eat, clean my room and do my homework, it feels good at the beginning, but as time goes on, it just doesn't feel good anymore.

I'm not even sure if I even feel trully happy about doing all of my responsibilities.

It doesn't feel as if a burden has been lifted of my shoulder.

It doesn't feel as if I were "refreshed" or more energetic after I do all of these.

I started slowly like my therapist recommended: I did a schedule to eat 3 times a day. It started rocky but then I manage to do it... but only for a while. Eating just didn't feel good either.

Every single time I finally clean my room, I don't feel any good: it just feels as though I wasted time because I don't feel any better.

Doing math homework is fun, philosophy to, but I don't like any of the other subjects I actually need to do homework for.

I know it might seem childish to only do things that feel good but I hate not being able to feel anything at all, especially when I do things that are supposed to help me but don't make me feel anybetter afterwards.

Has someone here went through anything similar? What do you do then, if so?

Edit: I have read all of your replies so far, but I don't know how to respond properly to them. All I can think of is to say thank you! I will try to change things (although slowly) today using your tips.

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[–] [email protected] 34 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

One of the essential features of ADHD is the rapid attenuation of the reward system, leading to a biological resistance to the "dopamine rush" that neurotypical people feel. (For me, it manifests most clearly in the fact that I have never in my life felt anything like the "runner's high" after exercise, although every neurotypical person I've spoken to says they feel refreshed, rejuvinated and pleasantly tired afterwards.)

This stems from the fact that the built-in reward system (the positive emotional response to performing/completing a task) attenuates very quickly in people with ADHD. By that I mean that while the response happens, it very quickly drops back to zero. Much faster than for people without ADHD.

This, I suspect, is one of the fundamental aspects of ADHD and why it's characterized by attention deficit and hyperactivity. Hyperactivity happens because in order to maintain the effects of the reward system we have to do and do and go go go over and over and over again. And we have attention deficit because our interest in any given thing drops extremely quickly, since the reward of experiencing it goes away almost immediately.

[–] fatbeets 9 points 1 year ago

I also had never experienced runner's high until I added extremely light runs. My regular runs would usually leave me tired so I thought that I didn't experience them like other people. I don't remember exactly why, I think it was I need to hit a higher mileage threshold, so I started trying to get any extra miles in anytime I could, including a light jog anywhere I needed to go. That's when I finally experienced it. For me, key to the runner's high was the runs that got my heart rate into zone 2-3 (approx. 60-75% max HR) but importantly weren't long runs which would tire me out. Tiredness is a big trigger for me to feel shitty so I think that's why I never had the feel goods after the runs.