me_irl

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herrwoland

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me_irl (lemmy.world)

submitted 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) by herrwoland to c/me_irl

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(original art by Herta Burbe)

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[–] [email protected] 24 points 7 months ago (1 children)

I don't quite agree. Yes, it's not as pronounced as it is displayed here, but there's still definitely a difference in statistical compatibility amount. If you have a very unusual life situation, with a non-neurotypical mental structure, the amount of compatible partners gets smaller and smaller compared to people that have a more "common" (specifically not using the word normal here) setup going.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago (1 children)

LGBTQ+ and non standard life situation gets ya basically zero partners, too. The dating pool for MLM is already tiny compared to cishet dating. Add into that being a caregiver for your parents and it's basically zero dudes that are willing to even consider you as a partner. :/ But I ain't throwing mama under the bus (or from the train) for no dick. Lol

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago (1 children)

While I have argued tor this comic being true/realistic, I vehemently reject a possible conclusion of dating pessimism based on it. I wholeheartedly believe that it's worthwhile to try to find compatible people in any situation and no matter what kind of person you are.

I think being gay and being a caregiver for your parents is a combination that doesn't reduce your dating pool too much :)

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago

I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm not suggesting any incel shit or anything. I just mean outside of major cities, MLM dating pools are tiny. It is reasonably possibly in many areas to personally know every single out queer person on a first name basis. So a much smaller dating pool than that of cishet daters.

The caregiving aspect of it also complicates things. I don't mean "I'm a caregiver so no one loves me!" Or anything like that. It's more "I'm a caregiver, and it's unreasonable to expect others to work or even be able to work around my schedule." I can't leave the house for more than two hours at a time, I can't have someone stay over, and I can't stay over at theirs. Dates are limited to activities that can be done within an hour within half an hours drive, and I have to vet their non-covidness beforehand. My life just isn't conducive to dating/romance.

I just wanna clarify, no incel shit. Just "life is complicated" shit. Lol. We all must sacrifice certain things for others, and I willingly sacrifice that aspect for time with my parents. I love them and wouldn't trade that time for anything else. I'm happy with my choices.

I do, however, have a mostly thriving hookup life. Lol. Gay community comes through for me there. Lmao