this post was submitted on 21 Mar 2024

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there's a reason it's "hard out there" you know (fedia.io)

submitted 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) by [email protected] to c/memes

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[–] partial_accumen 2 points 10 months ago (20 children)

to the loneliness epidemic (of which young men are the most likely victims).

I read this statement of yours my initial reaction is not very complimentary. Instead of making assumptions on what you mean and assuming the worst, I'm interested in your view to see if I would find validity with it, or if my initial reaction was sound. Do you have any source you'd consider objective on this you'd recommend me reading to explain your position/definition on this?

[–] PP_BOY_ 41 points 10 months ago (4 children)

A simple search with the keywords "men" and "loneliness epidemic" should pull up plenty of resources on the topic. I'm on mobile right now and don't feel like doing a whole deep-dive but here's an article from NASW

Quote:

A 2020 research study found that age and gender can influence how lonely people feel. Younger people report more loneliness than older people, and men are more vulnerable to loneliness that is more intense than women.

There's plenty of debate to be had for whose "fault" this is, but the fact that young men are facing the brunt of the loneliness epidemic is a matter of fact that's reinforced by countless polls.

[+] partial_accumen -26 points 10 months ago (3 children)

A simple search with the keywords “men” and “loneliness epidemic” should pull up plenty of resources on the topic.

Instead of me doing some rando search and assuming those were your views, I was asking for examples/articles on your views. I don't think you want Joe Rogan or Tate talking for you, do you? Both of those assholes show up in those broad searches.

I’m on mobile right now and don’t feel like doing a whole deep-dive but here’s an article from NASW

'Gender roles appear to contribute to male adolescent loneliness. “In most cultures, men are expected to provide. Men are expected to lead,” says Romero. '

I don't disagree that these ideas exist. Some cultures far more than others. In most western cultures however, the embrace of acknowledging the contributions and strengths of women work to combat this. The recognition that they've had it bad for hundreds of years and this new problem with men is a short term whiplash.

Men should reject these ideas that men are the default providers or leaders. Believe those are true is an irrational trap. Men can be leaders or providers, but so can women.

[–] FarmTaco 23 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I don’t disagree that these ideas exist. Some cultures far more than others. In most western cultures however, the embrace of acknowledging the contributions and strengths of women work to combat this. The recognition that they’ve had it bad for hundreds of years and this new problem with men is a short term whiplash.

What?

"Have they tried rejecting their depression? what, are they stupid?"

This is how it feels, and the reality of actually existing, Men are frequently valued based off of their potential(earning or otherwise) in the real world, just by saying you reject it isn't going to make this suddenly not true and just clear everything up in your life.

The solution to a young mans worry about his potential and place in life is... acknowledging the contributions and strengths of women? that is an opinion.

[+] partial_accumen -22 points 10 months ago (1 children)

What?

“Have they tried rejecting their depression? what, are they stupid?”

Congrats! I never said that. First, Clinical Depression is a serious matter and shame on you for trying to suggest that any amount of just thinking differently would change the outcome. There are documented medical causes and treatments by qualified psychiatrists. Millions of people suffer from Clinical Depression and its a serious matter. For those in need, I highly recommend seeking help. There's no shame it in. We're all broken and need help sometimes.

However, we're not talking about Clinical Depression. We're talking about social and cultural norms about the role of men and the disillusion that arises when those old ideas don't match today's reality.

This is how it feels, and the reality of actually existing, Men are frequently valued based off of their potential(earning or otherwise) in the real world,

By who? Who's opinion do you care about that is making that judgement of you? What is THEIR motive for judging you such?

just by saying you reject it isn’t going to make this suddenly not true and just clear everything up in your life.

Of course not. If you're looking for a 'silver bullet' solution you're not going to find one. Humans a irrational, greedy, hurt, self interested, and angry. Welcome to life. However, recognized what is important to you instead of seeking validation from others is the start.

The solution to a young mans worry about his potential and place in life is… acknowledging the contributions and strengths of women? that is an opinion.

The acknowledgement is that women have faced many of these same questions for hundreds or thousands of years. This isn't new. Its just new to young men. That recognition should do a few things:

Give you empathy that the women in your life you love have faced these struggles and you've been immune to them up to now. Talk to them. Ask them how they navigate life. While not all of it will, see if any of it can give you guidance too.
Realize you are not alone. No, not just other young men are in it with you, but lots of women too.
Start questioning where you derive your 'worth' from. Ask yourself why you're letting other people define that for you. Ask if you agree with their definitions.

[–] FarmTaco 1 points 10 months ago

Congrats! I never said that. First, Clinical Depression is a serious matter and shame on you for trying to suggest that any amount of just thinking differently would change the outcome.

Oh my bad.

This you?

Men should reject these ideas that men are the default providers or leaders. Believe those are true is an irrational trap. Men can be leaders or providers, but so can women.

Rejecting ideas -> changing the way they think

And not only that, you for some reason think that everyone should change their opinions to match your world view.

Sorry, I reject your giant wall of pedantry and goal post moving.

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