this post was submitted on 02 Feb 2024
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The vroom vroom motherfuckers are absolutely the worst. Years ago, a feral cat had her kittens on our back porch. I was present to witness the litter of kittens emerging from the nest the mother cat had made, behind an outdoor shelving unit and a garden hose. These little fuckers had NEVER SEEN THE WORLD OUTSIDE THAT SPACE. They were all emerging at once, six little innocent balls of fluff, cuter than anyone could adequately describe. They had made it about ten inches into the outside world when some shithead started blasting his fucking engine, on the road past my fence.
The poor little fuckers jumped in unison and squeezed themselves back into the den, in a complete state of panic. They didn't come out again for another day, at least.
So yeah, Mr. Big Masculine High Displacement Fuckoff Engine, out there...was he pulling chicks with that shit? Was he impressing ANYONE, at all, of any species? Nah. What he was doing was scaring the shit out of 14-day-old kittens. Fucking congratulations to his ass.