this post was submitted on 01 Feb 2024
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Autism

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I want to learn how to cook properly and make simple recipes and don't spend too much time looking for what to make everyday.

So I start looking into some recipes I can make with the instant pot that we have at home.

But then I can't find certain ingredients in the local supermarket, or the ingredients are too expensive, so I start searching for other places to buy cheaper produce. Then I also start looking at what recipes don't take too much time to make, and read about meal prep and such, and find communities and websites. And then I look at local classes for learning how to cook, but they are way too expensive and I'm not sure whether they will be any good, etc...

And so I spend hours and hours researching all these things, but I never actually start cooking or go to the grocery store for ingredients.

I'm now feeling tired and have no energy to actually do any cooking anymore. And I just have no clue where to get started.

It seems like I'm stuck thinking of how to do something the best way possible, instead of actually trying something. But when I want to try something, I have no idea where to even start.

Anybody experience the same sometimes?

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[–] KpntAutismus 5 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (5 children)

we have some standard recipes for boring stuff like pancakes or waffles stuck to the door of our cabinets, and the ingredients are all in a word document i print every time i go to the store.

maybe pick out a "good enough" one and print/write out the recipe, as long as it's easier to get to than most other recipes. when you have an easily accessible selection of meals you definetely like, it gets easier to decide what to make.

as for the ingredients themselves, you can order spices and stuff online (at least i'm pretty sure). can't do much about the prices though.

there's also the possibility to go to more than one grocery store, i have thought of making the word documents into sections for different stores.

also time doesn't matter much for me, a well made meal is ar least worth an hour of my time (but not always on a work day). that time is better spent making food than staring at youtube all day.

[–] NationProtons 3 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I actually like cooking, especially if it turns out well. And I don't really mind working on it for an hour or so. But this time I spent and entire free day looking up things to make and it felt a bit too much.

[–] KpntAutismus 2 points 9 months ago (1 children)

at some point, research into a topic will not get you any closer to a conclusion. i've had that situation many times, i recommend picking one of the recipes at random and just making it.

i've recently replaced my computer mouse, and since the entire market is trying to replicate the success logitech had, there's tens if not hundreds of options for lightweight mice.

i ended up ordering a steelseries one and returned it a few days later. i do not regret ordering it, because i have learned about how steelseries makes mice and their software. neither should you be scared of making a random meal, although you won't get your money back if it turns into a learning experience.

i ended up with the perfect mouse for me after that. and you will have your assortment of meals to make. i'm one of those "if it works, don't touch it" people and limiting yourself to like 10(?) spots in your recipe spot could help the... i'm just gonna call it 'fear of the subideal option'.

P.S.: that behaviour reminds me of myself during depressive episodes. may not be the case for you, just something my pattern recognition alerted me about.

[–] NationProtons 2 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Just starting with something random is a good idea. I think that's usually also how I get out of these situations.

I actually recently had the same issue when looking for a mouse. I wanted something lightweight, works with bluetooth for day to day work, but can also be used wired (with less latency). But it had to be with usb-c.

This was surprisingly hard to find and it took me several weeks before I decided. (Got the Keychron M3, which really fits my needs perfectly) Unfortunately this reinforces my behavior to keep researching for a long time before deciding. (honestly the time I spent on this was probably not worth it, even though it is a good mouse. I would probably have been fine using my old logitech for a while longer)

Sometimes there is not even an option that fulfills all criteria, and in those situations I can keep looking forever. Then it becomes really important to just let it go and get something that's "good enough".

Not sure how to train myself to do more of the opposite though.

You might be right that it has to do with my current mental state too. I recently moved to a different country, and (even just sensory wise) it has been an overwhelming week.

When overwhelmed, my mind tends to go blank and I just keep researching forever in some kind of zombie mode. I wish I knew a way to ease myself. But that is actually one of my main challenges, how to rest and recover. I tend to default to browsing/researching more online whenever I have nothing to do, or when I'm too tired.

[–] KpntAutismus 2 points 9 months ago (1 children)

that is such a coincidence! i bought the M3 mini!

the "fuck it, i'll try this one" approach has gotten me out of these research fatigues more times than i want to admit.

playing music is a great way to relax for me. even if it's boring, i'll listen to the tiny noises that made it into the recording or that the artist hid there at "the edge of it".

best of luck in your new place, and happy cooking.

[–] NationProtons 3 points 9 months ago

Haha, great choice of mouse :)

I never really got into music much, maybe because it's too distracting for me (especially with lyrics) I do feel like it can be very relaxing, but it heavily depends on the song. And I never bothered to make myself a playlist, so I don't really know what I would listen too. (and I will avoid that rabbit hole for the time being :P)

Thanks for the kind words.

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