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1 in 4 adults think smacking is necessary to 'properly raise' kids. But attitudes are changing
(theconversation.com)
this post was submitted on 13 Dec 2023
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There isn’t any good reason to hit your children as discipline. It may stop the behavior but it is gonna teach kids to use violence to deal with conflict with their peers or cause them anxiety later in life.
Spanking is coping for the parent, it isn’t effective or fair for the child. That being said, fear works and being generally gentle doesn’t so I understand why some parents feel like they have to. But it causes more damage than it fixes.
If you feel overwhelmed by parenting there is nothing wrong with seeking help via family therapy or even hiring a coach to assist you on how to handle difficult discipline situations with difficult children
I always struggle with this because it wasn't ever a big deal and I say that as the one getting spanked. It happened twice and afterwards, the threat was used to let me know when I was crossing the line. I certainly didn't "use violence" against my peers growing up.
I feel like most folks when they talk about kids being spanked, what they're imagining is more akin to child abuse rather than spanking.
It's just a tool like any other. It works on some kids, it doesn't on others.
I have similar experience. I am not aware of any grudge or lasting impact as a result of the beating. I am curious if you remember why you were beaten or if you, like me, only remember the beating itself. I probably remembered the reason for a year or so afterward but I have long since forgotten the offense that inspired the beating.
Yeah, that is not what we're talking about here.
We're talking about people who routinely, on a daily basis hit their children. Not hard enough to bruise, not full on beatings, but people who as part of normal daily life do things like smack their child's face or butt, grab them by the hands and lift them off the floor, push them down into seated position.
There are a LOT of people who really and honestly believe that physically bullying a toddler is a valid form of parental discipline, and would never believe that they were being abusive because they don't full on beat their children with a belt.
That's the behavior we're talking about here.