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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Winter_Search8794 on 2023-06-27 01:17:20+00:00.
I am the oldest of three children. My brother (37) Tim and I (39) are very close. We attend the same university and my husband did his residency with his husband (it's how we met). Over the past five years, the four of us have started renting a house together somewhere in the world for the month of August.
Last Saturday, we wee all at our mom's house and the topic of this August's trip came up. Our younger sister "Tammy" (34) was there with her husband Jim. Tammy, who had all the opportunities Tim and I did chose not to go to university. Jim has a GED and no other education. They both work in the service industry and are barely making ends meet. Tammy has long ben jealous of the difference in our lifestyles and often hints we should chip in so she can join us for some of the fun things we do. Tammy mentioned that she wished she could join us in August but clearly couldn't afford it, nor could they take a month off of work. She then hinted that perhaps we should chip in for her to be able to join us for a few days.
I wanted to cut that off so I said it was a shame but "choices have consequences. You did choose not to get an education and to marry someone with no education." My sister was very offended and she and Jim left.
Tim, who like me is sick of Tammy's pity party says I was justified but mom says AITA and I should apologize. Thoughts?
Yeah, I know OP probably won’t ever read this, but it has to be said: Yeah, you’re the asshole.
You’re all late 30s, early 40s … don’t you think they know this by now? You could have suggested they now know what education they need to progress further and take night classes to get a university degree or equivalent.
Just it saying like that slaps her and her choice of husband right in the face, two slaps for her and a big insult for hubby. Perhaps you’re also a bit too materialistic. Either way, some things aren’t ever said, especially like that. If she loves him, if he’s a good person and tries his best, then there should be at least emotional support offered and friendly guidance. That, though, was just being bitchy.