this post was submitted on 16 Nov 2023
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Story time:
My ex lived in another town and I went there by train. She waited for me on the station platform. I saw her first and took a detour over the neighboring platform because it was pretty crowded. I walked up beside her without her noticing me. Mind you, what follows was completely impromptu (we were both weirdos):
I looked sideways on her tits (she had nice really big tits, like, top 5% big). I spoke pretty loud so a lot of bystanders could hear it.
Me: Hmm, nice tits! Wanna fuck?
She checked me out from top to bottom.
Her: Sure, why not.
Me: OK. But, I gotta know what you taste like first.
Her: OK.
We went on to make the sloppiest wet kiss tongue-in-throat-style.
Me: Your place?
Her: Yah, let's fuck.
People looked at us in disgust, shock, or disbelief. Only one guy had the widest grin on his face. While going I gave her ass a good squeeze. The looks on the faces were priceless.
That’s close to one of the running jokes that my wife and I have. When we’re in the grocery or department store and we spilt up for a few, when I find her, I will sneak up behind her and say, “Excuse me ma’am, I know you don’t know me, but you’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. Can I pay for your stuff and take you back to my place?”
I always think I’m funny. She? Only sometimes. Me? Always.
I wouldn't mind if you offered to pay for my groceries either wink wink nudge nudge
Are you a goer? Wink wink, nudge nudge, know what I mean?
A nod's as good as a wink to a blind bat!