this post was submitted on 12 Oct 2023
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[–] captainlezbian 42 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Seeing some stories in here about how badly it goes to follow your exes so I’d like to offer an alternative story. I have no idea what’s going on in my ex’s life and it’s wonderful. She could be doing amazing, could be terrible, no answer would make me happy, and I’m happiest with no answer. I’m happily married now and don’t care.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yep I second this. I have gone NC with all my exes. Two wanted continued contact but that's just not me and sometimes people ask me what they're up to and I can happily respond I have NFI.

The past is the past.

[–] captainlezbian 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I’d be ok being friends with an ex. It’s looking one up that feels like hurting myself to hurt myself

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

In one case I found out they lied to me about why we broke up and the second she became a horrible, vindictive person after we broke up and started spreading lies and rumours about 6 month after we split. Originally both breakups were quite amicable and soured and they didn't understand that that had quite a lot to do with my decision to 100% no contact.

I don't think I'm 100% against it now that I think about it further. I just seem to have a history of dating people with an underlying hurtful streak and/or poor empathy...

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

My ex is in my class and it hurts.