this post was submitted on 25 Sep 2023
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„Read the room“ triggers me to no end (discuss.tchncs.de)
submitted 1 year ago by [email protected] to c/autism
30 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 

Recently I read through the comments on a post and someone suggested OP should „just read the room“.

I have been told this since I was young and it triggers me every time.

Being unaware of social dynamics in a situation is a thing a lot of autistic people I know struggle with. „Reading the room“ in my understanding means „becoming aware of the unspoken things in a situation“.

Collins dictionary says: If you say that someone reads the room, you mean that they understand their audience and adapt what they say to suit it.

I think, although not on purpose, saying this is massively ableist and making fun of someone for „not reading the room“ is harassment imo.

Feel free to give an opposing opinion as well. I would like to hear them.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

This makes me remember my mom saying "try to but yourself in their shoes" and "you're not even trying to understand them".

This is the definition of knowing what you're doing wrong but still not knowing how to fix it. Nowadays I just ignore such comments. I accept that there's phrases that make sense to everyone else except me and there's phrases that make sense to me and not everyone else. And that's ok.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Right in the feels! Ouch. But thanks for sharing. I know the feeling.