this post was submitted on 20 Jun 2023
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Asexual

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submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by kabukimeow to c/asexual
 

I've been identifying as ace for 10 years at this point, and I have always for the most part been completely fine with it. But recently I've been feeling very lonely. I can't quite vibe with the "I don't need nobody ๐Ÿ˜Ž" ace meme energy anymore as I mostly just feel sad about it. The worst part is that I'd rather "date" or whatever ace-date, qpr, I don't know, another woman, but I don't really have options because I live in a small town. It's kinda been wearing me down :(

Also, I got a little lesbian flag colour sticker recently and I feel like an impostor. Though I am bambi lesbian I think? But still...

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[โ€“] linkinkampf19 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

I'm in a sorta similar sitch. Ace guy, out for ~8-9 years, but also identifying as gay. Currently in process of exiting an 8 year marriage with a now out lesbian, and she's having her actually very awesome girlfriend move in next month. Big enough house for all of us to coexist as roommates (they were roommates...), but while not feeling pressure to date, I feel like it's the next logical step even though the drive isn't quite there. I don't think I consider myself aromantic, but I've also been in this "faux" relationship for so long that maybe I need to take a breather, and collect myself.

I know much of that was a ramble, but here to talk and realize there are more of us out there. The struggle is real, and I'm glad to see at least one other human here dealing with something I felt so alone with. Definitely having the imposter syndrome bit too, but I think a lot of that stems from upbringing and comphet.

[โ€“] kabukimeow 2 points 1 year ago

Much strength to you! I often think about whether I actually want a relationship, or if I "want" it because of social conditioning.