this post was submitted on 18 Aug 2023
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So I live in the cousin-fuckingly-deep south where 90% of what's on the road is trying its best to be a monster truck... I drive what looks like a pregnant rollerskate by comparison cuz I don't want to send half my paycheck into the gas tank.
It's funny-sad how the folks in the giant trucks get offended just by seeing my tiny car. Every day there's always at least one asshole in an F-350 or some shit that likes to ride up on my ass cuz I guess it makes them feel powerful? I just drop a mph every couple seconds until either they fuck off or get annoyed enough to pass.
Anyway, moral of the story is that stupid-big vehicles are here to stay in the US, at least in the regions occupied by Y'all Quaeda. Their trucks are one of their few sources of self esteem.
...I'm really tempted to find one of those rubber testicle things that the cowboys like to put between the rear wheels of their trucks, but like a comically tiny one, color it like the trans flag, and hang it on the back of my tiny car just to annoy the rednecks on the road. ...although here, that'd probably get my car or myself shot.
I got the chevy spark right before it got discontinued and the amount of people who comment on my small car in the south is obsurd. It's great being able to fit into a parking spot between 2 monster trucks and it only costs like 25 dollars for a tank of gas. People who see vehicles as more than just a means of transportation baffles me. I like the tiny truck nuts idea I might have to steal that.