this post was submitted on 14 Jun 2023
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Mental Health

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Hey everyone,
I [28F] need some advice on handling anxiety when job hunting.

Almost a week ago I finished school and I'm once again without work. I've been job hunting about 40-50% of my adult life and it has taken a huge toll on my mental health to the point where I'm barely able to apply for jobs anymore. I have gotten a few warnings over the years due to not applying to enough jobs. ( I live in Sweden btw )

I have tried taking breaks.
I have tried waiting for the anxiety to pass.
I have asked so many for advice but it's like they all give the same default answer. If their advice where enough, I would be a pro at job hunting.

I did get an autism diagnosis a few years back and I do feel better about myself, more confident and understanding of how I work so I think this time around will be different, but it's like the old anxiety still hangs around and I don't know how to get rid of it.

Please if you have any advice, I'd love to hear it.

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[โ€“] monkeytennis 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

I wouldn't be surprised if I fell into that first level, I've spent much of my life trying to decode what people actually mean.

It's slightly risky asking for moderate accomodations, so I might not try it for the first time on a job I desperately wanted, and an agency or small place is more likely to agree than a big corporate. I'd ask them beforehand, I think it would be too awkward and unexpected if suggested during the actual interview.

I'd make it a casual request by email when the interview date is confirmed. E.g. "I sometimes find interviews stressful, would you be open to visiting a local cafe? I completely understand if that's not possible". It could be worded better, but I wouldn't be put off by that. Coffee interviews are a thing, and I like them - I get to expense a nice coffee! I'd pick a quiet place with good seating.

However, unless you do find it hard to be in an office at all, I'd want to make it clear during the interview that I'm normally fine with offices, so they don't get the wrong impression (that you'll refuse to work in an office) and I also wouldn't dwell on it. They've made an accomodation, so they'll expect you to be more relaxed. If you're still visibly stressed, that might be a red flag.

Anyway, I'm rambling now, but I do feel for you, it's very stressful.

[โ€“] CoffeeTails 2 points 1 year ago

ooh yeah, it is a bit risky, and I don't even know for sure if it will help with the stress. I think I would fit better in a smaller office where they have a bit more freedom.

I don't mind offices in themselves, it's more that interview thing that makes me super nervous.

Thank you so much for all the input! ๐Ÿ’•