this post was submitted on 30 Jan 2025
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"You're pretty and smart and drag likes the way you see the world and you have a big heart."
Y'all don't know how to compliment your dragons properly. Tell it that it's pretty and smart and kind. Easy.
That's what I would personally call "cheap".
Among those words the only one that could barely resonate would be "I like the way you see the world", but that's still pretty reductive as I doubt your partner at the time is doing groundbreaking philosophy.
And it doesn't say much about your feeling toward anybody else that share the same outlooks/lifestyle.
That's cheap? What would you consider deep, then? Binding your soul to your partner's in an ancient ritual?
Depth here just means thinking more about their inner life and choosing a compliment based on your intimate knowledge about how they feel. That kind of compliment demonstrates the connection in a way that feels profound, rather than mere flattery.
About fifteen years ago I told my partner, rather artlessly I thought, that I love them not in spite of their flaws but because of them, too. It wasn't what you'd call genius material but the words were intended to quell a deep fear of conditional love, and they still haven't forgotten the compliment. Despite not being anywhere near poetry or a grand gesture, the fact that I realized this could not be left implicit was an important moment in our relationship.
Not a perfect example, but it's the best I've got.
A combination of "I don't know I just do" and "Probably because of my experiences as a child".
Huh. So knowing your own desires makes relationships shallow in most people's eyes?
Drag sure is glad not to be normal