this post was submitted on 16 Jan 2025
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No you didn't, masculine is still a gender. I'm totally willing to believe that this was an innocent mistake to begin with but by tripling down on it like this you're just being a dick.
You understand that English does have gender neutral pronouns, right? "His" just isn't one of them. At any rate, given that Rose has her pronouns in her display name there's no need to use neutral language anyway.
Calm down guy, it doesnt even seem like the person you're talking about took offense with it. Why claim their outage for your own?
yawn
This whole-ass thread is terrible and I downvoted everyone
Name a gender-neutral singular third person pronoun from English that isn't "it" (calling people "it" in English is very offensive, but in Finnish it's just natural colloquialism, but I know enough to avoid that in English)
they
eta: to degender your comment you could say "this person knows their junkies"
but being as you've been beaten over the head with the fact that the OP uses she/her pronouns that would also be misgendering her.
leaving it as using a masculine pronoun is rude at best and blatantly transphobic at worst. nobody thinks you were being actively harmful when you said it but not being willing to change it is toxic.
you're not the hero here.
"They" is plural, not singular.
It can be used to refer to single people, and using a plural instead of a singular is a very common way for many languages to show deference to the person you're speaking to. Like in Finland. English already did that and did it so much it got rid of the second person singular, as "you" is a second person plural. This ofc meant there was nowhere for English to go vis-a-vis showing deference, so English really stresses titles. Narcissism of small differences, really.
Based on the votes I'll have to disagree and say you don't really know what others think.
So, to reiterate, you would rather that I start using archaic stereotypes to think about people and language? I have to condition myself into thinking of everyone as either a boy or a girl, and always make a mental note to gender someone as soon as I make contact with them? The first thing I do should be to gender them? That's your takeaway?
Maybe try reading my comments again, with some thought. You're not the hero here.
incorrect, "they" can be singular or plural. that's not even a recent "woke mind virus" change to the language, it's always been the case.
you literally did gender her immediately when you said "guy ... his" the appropriate thing to do would be to respect the pronouns she put on her profile when they were pointed out to you.
Thus it's not a singular. It can be used as one, but it doesn't specify a singular, thus it isn't one. I can use a shovel as an axe, but it doesn't make it an axe, even though both are tools for splitting wood.
"You" isn't singular.
I'll demonstrate how sorely you are wrong in this matter. If you can translate the following sentence to English without it losing meaning or misgendering someone, I'll change my comment; "hänen autonsa." Take care to notice it is not synonymous with "heidän autonsa".
Go ahead. I'll wait.
Also gendered language btw
So you're saying you don't believe women can be heroes?
That's super sexist.
They can be, if they change their gender identity. Same way they'd become actors or waiters. Blame the 8 languages duct taped together that form English.
There's no need. "An actor" / "a hero" is already a gender neutral term in common usage, no matter how archaic your inner world is or whatever conservative bumfucknowhere you live in.
So the male version of the word is the default? That's sexist.
Sometimes common usage is wrong. That's the whole reason society is having a discussion about pronouns and gendered language. You need to do better, no matter how archaic your inner world is or whatever conservative bumfucknowhere you live in.
The lemma is the default.
Okay so what youre saying is that we should differentiate between male and female actors with specific words to... ensure heteronormativity in the way you see it? Despite feminists calling the exact opposite for several decades before you were even born?
http://downloads.bbc.co.uk/worldservice/learningenglish/weekender/scripts/weekender_actor_070406.pdf
So just so you know, you're insisting on implying all women actors to be whores. Sexist as fuck
You need to do better, no matter how archaic your inner world is or whatever conservative bumfucknowhere you live in.
Idk how long you spent googling, trying to find something that would support your point, but the fact that the best you could come up with was only relevant to the UK in the 1970s is p funny. Did you think you were arguing with Elton John?
Guy who definitely isn't a conservative was just trying to enforce 60 year old social norms a minute ago lol
Yeah I wrote that on my mobile in like a minute flat, lol.
Just how young or ignorant do you need to be to not know that feminism doesn't want women actors to be called "actresses" (as it implies being a prostitute)?
It's what feminism has been doing SINCE the 70's. Not "IN the seventies."
One of us clearly has better command of the English language. Not that I'm appealing to authority, but, weirdly you dropped arguing over "the male form" after I linked a Wiki article on what a lemma is... Guess you hadn't heard that word before? You're welcome for the lesson. ;>
Conservatives like you are disgusting af.
I'm way more interested in what actresses want to be called than what feminists believe they should be called, unless those feminists are also actresses. Most actresses seem to prefer actress. That's good enough for me.
"...but that was the entirety of my last post and 75% of this one"
What in the name of Dunning Krueger happened in your life that made you fall so deeply in love with yourself? I bet you were an only child.
You're purposefully trying to misrepresent the view of feminism as an ideology as an errant thought of a few people who identify as feminists, implying that I'm wrong in saying that actors want to be called actors, not "actresses", you sexist pig.
You need more sources?
https://www.backstage.com/magazine/article/actor-vs-actress-76531/
https://www.reddit.com/r/EnglishLearning/comments/trac9n/about_gendered_words_if_the_word_actress_exist/
https://historianruby.com/2018/04/14/why-was-the-perception-of-the-actress-and-the-prostitute-interchangeable-in-the-eighteenth-century/
https://actingmagazine.com/2024/12/why-cant-we-say-actress-anymore/
What, "in recent years"? It wasn't just in the past? o.O
Why do you want to needlessly gender things? Just because you're from bumfucknowhere doesn't mean that men wearing skirts or women wearing pants should be that difficult to handle, really. You honestly can't expect the world to conform to your conservative views.
Guess I hit a sensitive place teaching you a lesson? :F I'm actually a middle child. Well, was, technically, depending on how you look at it, as mom had another kid later with another man, so now I'm 2/4 and that's not the middle, so...
Wow look at all that text and all those links, must have been an exhausting session on google cherry picking things that support your argument, now I feel a little bad about not reading a single word of it.
I've literally seen this more than a thousand times. It's so pathetic.
Ah, yes, "cherry picking" from all the answers supporting my rhetoric, because none support your delusions and I couldn't find such even if I attempted to
Remember this is just one profession.
Do you call a painter a "paintress"? (So weird how that wiki link has "archaic" in before the word, isn't it? :P)
https://www.cjr.org/language_corner/womens_suffixes.php
Weird how you seem to have trouble finding anything on Google to cherrypick from, isn't it? ;>
Why are you needlessly gendering things which don't need and do not want to be gendered?
I didn't read that one either
"Look, I'm replying to comments I admit to not reading! I've won this debate!"
Yeah see I'm not too convinced. Mainly for having seen this asinine reaction more than a thousand times. Which is why I awaited for it.
I was sort of "playing with my food" as it were. I don't need any sources. I don't need any authority to weigh in on this, because of just how massively wrong you were to begin with, and now I'll try to simplify why, and I don't really care whether you read it or not, as the point of forums isn't one-on-one conversation, but public speaking. (Your messages are and will be public.)
So... here's the coup de grâce;
Which one of the following English sentences would you use to express admiration and adoration of a person?
"[female celebrity] is my heroine!"
OR
"[female celebrity] is my hero!"
See if you use the first one, as your rhetoric implies you want to, and think everyone should participate in this needless gendering, then you're implicitly saying you don't understand that saying "x is my heroin" outloud means you're addicted to something instead of admiring it (and that you don't understand that "hero" is the colloquially used form). Which leads us back to me having a better command of the English language than you, making this conversation rather futile. <3
Didn't read that
What is projection alex?
You defending some guy who's wrong for....reasons?
How could they be wrong? They apologized and explained that it isn't intentional and why. What exactly do you need to be happy here, seppuku?
They didn't apologize, they doubled down with some of the most insipid bullshit about pronouns not existing in English and how they're "depronouning english", despite defaulting to using the masculine, instead of just saying "oh yeah, I didn't see the name, I'll edit my comment".
So it's rude of me to not see gender, but it's not rude of you to purposefully misrepresent what I said?
"Depronouning"?
No. DISGENDERING. Ie, "if everyone treated English the same as me, you'd have nothing to scream about, because there'd be no distinction for you to complain about" as English would have evolved to the point where it left out unnecessary gendering. Like how it's somewhat offensive to call women actors "actresses", but also, some think it's quite respectful. It very much depends on the context. For another actor, calling them an "actor" instead of "actress" would mean they're being misgendered on purpose, when the other person is purposefully not using the unnecessary gendering of words, or in other words actively disgendering English.
So, is Natalie Portman an actor or an actress? **Either way you answer, I can still use the same bullshit highroading rhetoric you're using rn to pretend like you're intentionally misgendering them.
There is no gender-neutral singular third person pronoun in English. "They" isn't singular. It's plural. It's not like I refuse to address people by their preferred pronouns. I simply did not look, and used "the default." Now we can argue what "should" be the default, but you're not gonna make my brain gender people or think of pluralities as singularities. I'll address people in singular they and respect it if they choose to, but I'm not gonna default to it over you not liking how English doesn't have a gender-neutral third person singular pronoun. We in Finnish do ("hän"), but it's reserved for pets and polite conversation in the media. The colloquial way in Finnish is to refer to people as "it" ("se"), but as I've stated previously, I know how offensive the connotation in English can be. Swedish is trying to copy us an add a gender-neutral third person singular. English should attempt to as well. Like "shim". Go on, influence English enough to change the default and I'll adopt the new default. No biggie.
An appology doesn't have to say sorry if they aren't sorry dude. They explained it and hilariously the person minging about it the most immediately assumed the person you're mad at's gender which is just hilariously hypocritical.
That's literally what they said minus I'll edit my comment. So what's the benefit of editing the comment? Will it reverse time or remove context so you not rose will be less offended.
An apology does have to say sorry or it's just an explanation. If they aren't sorry, they're not apologising, they're just telling you what happened in a way that takes 0 responsibility.
I know all I need to about you from this one simple statement and now realise you'll be too pig headed to approach this in any way other than antagonistically in a desperate attempt to browbeat the other person into submission. Because for you, it's not about reaching consensus, it's about your own ego.
You do you bro, I don't care enough about anyone in this debate to bother responding anymore. Peace.
No that can be an apology, it however isn't the only way to apologize.
You know dictionaries? Try one.
I wonder how long you had to scroll to find that one. Taking an overly literal definition instead of understanding the context and spirit of what an apology is: the last bastion of the guy who cares more about winning than being right.
It's the second definition online for me so exactly one.
The spirit of apology is not saying sorry dude. You don't need it anyway and she didn't ask for it. You're the weird demanding one.
Which means you intentionally scrolled past the most common definition which requires you to be sorry because it proved you wrong.
Good luck being single the rest of your life lol
No I used my preferred dictionary not the one paid for by a company to be at the top.
Projection much? Legit that's the most disgruntled single person shit I've ever heard. You want to hit some other incel talking points while you're at it?
Urban dictionary? You skipped the first definition because it included the word sorry and made you look like a moron.
Nah, been happily married 10 years, ya incel. Sounds like I hit a nerve.
It's Webster's you absolute bafoon.
Either you're trying to fuck me or you have personal relationship issues so if you aren't single I fear for your partner of nothing else but for your stupidity and ego.
🤡
https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/apology
You picked the second definition on Webster's because the first one made you look like a clown. The second one is even marked "excuse" because it's being used in the literary sense and not in the sense of apologising to someone.
Fucking lol
Is today the day you find out words can have multiple interpretations? Do you think they list two for personal amusement?
Yes, an apology without a sorry is an excuse, it's also by definition an appology. English is fun and you are dumb.
Lol, you realise the 1. And 2. On a dictionary imply separate contexts, right? You intentionally chose the context for apology that applies to a defence of criticism in literature, not a person to person apology for a mistake made.
You've made yourself a clown and now you're doubling down. It's so rich, I love it. I'm going to end this little exchange on this delicious high note. Enjoy your weekend with your hand, buddy, because I won't respond anymore, I'll just let you impotently stew in it!
Yes the context is one includes a sorry the other does not do remind me again, does it at all say it's not an accurate definition?
So again, Rose doesn't want anything here. So why is a hollow sorry to you of all people a reasonable step? Do you want a genuine answer or do you just want to feel like their white knight?
To me its fairly fucked up you assume a woman cant defend herself and instead take their outage onto yourself so you feel better. You're pathetic.