this post was submitted on 15 Jan 2025
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Greentext
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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.
Be warned:
- Anon is often crazy.
- Anon is often depressed.
- Anon frequently shares thoughts that are immature, offensive, or incomprehensible.
If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.
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It’s not necessarily an easy problem to solve. I think the woman should have given him a chance and generally everyone should avoid reacting so strongly to “dealbreakers” on a first date.
That being said, Anon can also consider not bringing up anime and video games right off the bat. It doesn’t mean you can never share this. It may be just fine given more context (you are moderate about it, still open to other things, etc.). We all make snap judgments that we regret later. It’s ok for you to help your dates avoid these (barring serious things like hiding if you have a kid).
I'm sorry, but dealbreakers are dealbreakers for a reason. And dealbreakers aren't stuff that should be treated like it can be changed easily. Dealbreakers are things like political alignments, interest in having children, marriage and other stuff.
And asking women to give a guy they don't like "just a chance" has not done anything ever for anyone, seriously. The amount of times I hear about women giving the "weird guy" a second chance has always ended in the guy either seriously overstepping boundaries or taking the later rejection even worse. I have yet to meet a "weird guy" who hasn't done something seriously heinous later down the line.
And I am certain you didn't mean it that way, but saying "It's ok for you to help your dates avoid these" makes it sound like you're advocating for invalidating womens opinions, as if they can't make decisions for themselves and need help from a man to make the "right" one.