this post was submitted on 22 Dec 2024
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[–] [email protected] 127 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (7 children)

And then what happened?
That must be really hard for you.
Wow. You don’t deserve that.
How do you feel about it now?
Ugh. That sounds awful.
You’re handling this better than I would.
How do you even respond to that?
Tell me about it.
What can I do to help?
You’ve got this, but I’m here.

Edit: I wrote the above to illustrate how many options there are in the parlance of active listening. The formula is simple: imagine how they feel and join their side or, if you can’t yet imagine, ask questions until you can. That’s it.

[–] diffusive 4 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Awesome list! Much better than a list I would make 🙂

I would just change slightly the “What can I do to help?” (That is a call for a “nothing”) to “How can I help?” (That shows much more enthusiasm in wanting to help)

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

Hey thanks! I like that phrasing better. Less perfunctory, more sincere.

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