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My family is not emotionally open and I get frustrated easily (self.buddhism)

submitted 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) by cameleon to c/buddhism

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So basically the title, my family is not emotionally open and often cold toward me showing love to them. They never answer to I love yous. I am really into showing love to people I love. I know they love me but they don't show it. I feel always rejected when I show a little love and getting nothing back though I know I shouldn't expect anything back and plus I understand they are emotion-shy so not take it to heart. But in some way it disturbs my Buddhist learning because I don't know if I could handle people not showing compassion if I show them compassion. What's your take on it?

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 months ago (1 children)

This may sound harsh, but it's a "you" problem. Other people aren't reacting the way you expect them to, and you're disappointed.

We don't get to choose how others behave. Having an expectation of such things is a clear path to disappointment.

I'm not Buddhist (I've read a little), but it seems to me this is a fundamental understanding in Buddhism, isn't it? It's certainly something I've seen in Eastern thinking/philosophy, and embraced in Cognitive Behavioural Psychology.

[–] cameleon 2 points 2 months ago

It's not harsh I know it's a "me" problem but I was asking guidance with this post from other Buddhists