this post was submitted on 13 Nov 2024
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ADHD
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ADHD dad with 15 year old ADHD son here (also, I have a severely ADHD dad... undiagnosed / untreated, probably like most boomers with ADHD). Second what other's said. My son is like the least aggressive person ever. Observations of his childhood vrs my childhood vrs stories of my dad's childhood make me STRONGLY believe aggression in ADHD kids is environmental / cultural in nature... for whatever that's worth.
Homework and chores, hands down. My son says he'll do it, and doesn't want help / doesn't want to be reminded. But GFL unless I sit down and do it with him.
Son is an only child, but he gets along REALLY well with his 9 year old cousin (who also has ADHD) and his friends. My son runs LARPs for them. If my son gets angry / aggressive toward anyone in the family, it's his mother, who sets the strongest boundaries with him. It's been like that all his life. Mostly they have a good relationship, but whatever social strain he has going on, it's there.
N/A. My son is not aggressive (and never has been). When faced with aggressive behavior from other children, he tries to talk them down and withdraws / gets depressed if it doesn't work. Again, I attribute this to his early childhood education and to the culture he grew up in. I would say changing the culture / teaching self management and communication tools EARLY is the best advice possible.
Worst case, my son and I can enable each other with some of our dysfunctional ADHD behavior and tendencies and we need help from other family members to keep us all on track.
See above about culture and education.
Thanks so much for writing this detailed response. I really appreciate it!