What's your relationship like with your grandparents?
My grandma passed last weeek. I've been thinking about my relationship with her and my other grandparents. My family and I visit them on holidays and they were nice enough. But I don't feel like I knew my grandma or know my other grandparents.
I think my family is weird maybe? Idk it's the only one I know lol. We'd talk about tv and movies we've watched recently. What they watched. Tell the grandparents what was going on in our lives. Ask about what was going in grandma and grandpas life. Mostly get answers like "same old same old", tales of doctor visits, or NCIS.
But like who are they as people? What were dreams when they were young? what adventures have they been on? what sparks joy in their life? What struggles have been through?
Like if I had to describe my grandmother I'd say she was a nice, pleasant lady who was mostly kind and liked cats, but not enough to get her own, just fed the neighbors cat. A description a stranger could give after meeting her talking for a bit maybe.
Looking back at my relationship with my grandparents, it all feels surface level. I never shared any of the hard shit I was dealing with, never really vulnerable around them. They were never vulnerable around me.
I don't know many details of their life beyond career, maybe the places they've lived, pets they've owned.
Maybe that's a reflection on my parents. We were never really vulnerable with each other about stuff, when someone was it was often mocked. My parents were not good parents a lot of the time. Who knows maybe that's a result of their parents?
But umm yeah, Lemmy what's your relationship like with your grandparents? Are you real close? Do you know them well, or more like a coworker you enjoy occasionally small talking with? Or rotten shitbags? I wish I knew my grandma better.
All my grandparents are dead but when they where alive we did the usual thing which was meeting few times a year. On top of that I used to call them at least once a month and we've talked about everything and nothing, usual small talk. The interesting part is that I got a lot of insights between the lines and I had a pretty good idea how my grandparent were in their early years.
If you want a better relationship with your grandparents, call them every now and there or visit them and have a casual conversation. After a while you will know them way better. And if you're not comfortable with what they say, just let it slide. Old people are known for not giving a crap about political correctness.