Asklemmy

43806 readers

1539 users here now

A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions

Search asklemmy 🔍

If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!

Open-ended question
Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
An actual topic of discussion

Looking for support?

Looking for a community?

Lemmyverse: community search
sub.rehab: maps old subreddits to fediverse options, marks official as such
[email protected]: a community for finding communities

~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_[email protected]~

founded 5 years ago

MODERATORS

[email protected]

What should have hindered you when you were younger but ended up being a positive part of your growth? (lemmy.ml)

submitted 1 month ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

8 comments fedilink hide all child comments

And by should have I mean "should have" because this kind of thing can be subjective.

I'll start. Senior year of high school I would often skip class to go to the park and smoke weed with my partner (at the time). This park had a lot of birds. The sometimes silly, sometimes strategic, sometimes social and cooperative behavior of the birds blew my 17 year old stoned mind. I remember my partner and I would theorize about what they were doing and thinking. I thought it was super cool. I still think birds are super cool.

Now, many years later, I have a PhD in a behavior adjacent field. I don't study birds specifically or anything like that, but those experiences and curiosities pushed me in this direction.

Maybe it was all inevitable: these are deep interests that would have been pulled out of me in one way or another. The tinder was inside of me and if it wasn't getting stoned at the park as a teenager and watching birds that sparked the flame, something else would have. Who knows.

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] LaunchesKayaks 4 points 1 month ago

If by younger, you mean two years younger than now, them I have a story that is applicable in regards to my career.

Got fired from my first job in my field (IT, specifically tech support/help desk.) The firing was unexpected and done in a Tuesday afternoon with zero warning. I wasn't given and kind of formal write-ups and had been getting great performance reviews. I was crushed. The reasoning that my boss told me was that "I wasn't learning fast enough." Which was absolute bullshit because I was left alone to run the department on a regular basis. I did all of my tasks and did them well and users loved me.

I suspect I was the fall guy for all the failing projects my boss was implementing. They cost far more money than he said they would. I believe I was fired so he wouldn't get a pay cut.

I was absolutely heartbroken and considered going into another field entirely, after fighting my way through the rampant sexism in college and in job hunting. The first tech job I applied to after being fired (three days later), called me almost immediately after I applied. I did a phone interview and was then asked to do a practical interview the next day. I did well enough to get offered the job before I had finished the half hour drive home.

I make so much more money now, have great benefits, and I am respected and encouraged to grow. This job is absolutely incredible.

My grandmother says getting fired from my previous job was the best thing that happened to my career and I agree with her.

The emotional damage getting fired like I did has given me crippling anxiety that my therapist likens to that of PTSD, but without some of the PTSD symptoms. I'm getting treatment for it, and I'm at the stage where it's getting worse before it gets better.

I had an hour long panic attack when I had to tell my boss that a doctor told me to take a week off to recover from an injury that wasn't healing right and hindering my daily life. My boss wasn't pleased and told me my attendance will need to be near perfect because I have already missed a lot (I have.) I'm not worried about getting fired anymore, so I haven't panicked since, but I do get flare ups of anxiety. I get to go back and face everyone on Tuesday and hope that I won't have to talk about it face to face because I will end up panicking then.