I feel this whole volume could be condensed down. It adds a lot of extra information and adds his values and why he acts how he does. But I am reading this novel because of White, she’s the main source of entertainment and is what’s making it interesting. Volume 11 just starts to drag on.

So to improve this series I would remove this volume and have a few chapters of his backstory.

Spoilers for Volume 16 (Ending)

Volume 16 is the end of the series, in this volume the main cast race to the lower stratum to the conjuring controlling the skills. White and Demon Lord Ariels team is trying to destroy it to save Sariel, and Dustin & Guli Gulis team are trying to save it to save the planet. After they reach it they end up facing off against Administrator D who will give her power to keep it running if they can beat her. It ends with them succeeding and White becoming Administrator Ds maid.

The ending was defiantly botched. The author gave White and Demon Lord Ariel 1 line of goodbyes. After they have been through so much it just feels unrealistic. White is someone who doesn’t speak much but still there should have been more.

In the end White also becomes a maid for Administrator D. Again White who has been trying to survive and live her life with pride now becomes a maid without raising any objections. I understand that D is extremely powerful and has some power over her, she has a debt to her for saving the world and has some attraction to D after meeting back on earth and finding out she is a clone of D. But I still don’t buy that she would go along without any issues.

So I would give White and Demon Lord Ariel more time to say goodbye and have White at least trying to get her freedom if we follow the original ending. But I would prefer to rewrite a completely different ending.

Thank you for reading my rant.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

I actually dropped Spider? in volume 11. I always hated the human side chapters with a passion and shifting the story more and more towards their side made me lose interest in the plot entirely. And when vol 11 was almost only human side it was the breaking point for me.

the same thing happened with SlimeTensei and Yuuki and his gang. Interestingly around the same volume number. Is there something in the 11-12-13 range of volumes that makes authors discard their series premise? Like year 7 of a marriage?

Anyway, my pro-tip for authors: if your series is called Spider/Slime/Sword/BigMac/whatever then your readers are reading for the Spider/Slime/Sword/BigMac/whatever. Don't shift the focus away from what they bought your book for in the first place. It's not that hard.