this post was submitted on 20 Aug 2024
860 points (98.0% liked)
Facepalm
186 readers
572 users here now
Anything that makes you apply your hand to your face.
founded 5 months ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
IMO, a lot of this "lady's" complaint is a result of equality, and the "me too" movement (and related concepts). None of which is bad. I'll make that clear. This is not a bad thing.
Guys are respecting me, and leaving me alone when I say so? Omg, what a fucking shocker. Something that should have always been the case is happening and she's.... What? Upset about it?
Does she want to date rapists? People who would physically and emotionally force themselves on their victims? That's the exact behavior we're trying to eliminate. WTF?
Lady, as a guy, I want to inform you that, we're not the problem here.
If you like someone, and they ask you on a date, say yes. It's that simple.
There's a weird hyper-romanticized idea of men sweeping women off their feet with grand gestures and soul moving ballads.
But these tend to be storybook romances that imply the woman is pinning for the man and just looking for an excuse to say yes.
What's Prince Charming supposed to do when you say you're not interested? Just stare at you like a whipped dog and making whimpering sounds until you come around?
Idk, lady. If hitting on people is so easy, why don't you try it?
Saw a girl post a video talking about "Men aren't persistent anymore. My father asked out my mother and she said no, she was a waitress and he kept asking until she agreed to go out with him. My uncle did the same thing with my aunt, she was a cruise director and he was in the band on the ship, and he kept on asking what will it take for you to go out with me?"
Miss, your father and uncle grew up in a time when you could pay your college tuition working at Steak & Shake, get a white collar breadwinning job by looking the manager in the eye and giving him a firm handshake, buy a house for $20,000 and ask out a coworker without being fired. Here in 2024 saying "Hey do you want to go out for coffee sometime" is a career ending move. Asking out a waitress is how you signal the manager to ask you to leave the bar or restaurant. Compared to the 80's or 90's women in the United States handle being asked out very badly. "The worst she can say is no" is very much no longer the case. So if he even bothers to shoot his shot at all anymore "persistence" isn't even in his head.
That's simply not true. Not unless you're asking it persistently, to the point where people find it annoying.
And I think that's the hitch people get caught on. They don't realize when they're being annoying, so they're either too brash or too shy.
One of my favorite things to witness (usually via video) is someone being persistent, to the point of annoyance, bring told "no" every time, with varying degrees of profanity mixed in.... Then when something happens that makes the annoying person who is persistent finally stop (usually involving physical violence), they say "all you had to do was say no!"
Aaaahahahaha. You were an annoying little shit and wouldn't take no for an answer despite being told no repeatedly. You deserved what you got, you dumb fuck.
Yeah everyone has their own limit before it becomes a problem. There are some women out there who are taking to Tiktok asking "why don't men approach me at work anymore?" She's outright open to it. There are women out there who will overlook an unwanted advance or two if it isn't a recurring problem. And there are some women out there whose limit is "any attention at all whatsoever. Catcalling should be a felony #metoo." There are men who report being disciplined or fired for so much as saying "I like that outfit." How many mines do you have to plant in a field before you start calling it a minefield?
In any case it certainly makes "being persistent" sound like a very bad strategy, doesn't it? I think we can label that strategy well and truly dead.
I work in this area, and in my experience, there is way more going on than just a compliment about an outfit whenever someone is getting disciplined. Employees who claim that usually have no ability to self-reflect about the extent or appropriateness of their behaviour.
bull. shit.
Hahha bullshit.