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How to help 6-year old with social skills, parents unable to help (infosec.pub)

submitted 1 month ago by [email protected] to c/parenting

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Our 6-year old has been having problems, socially, or so she says. I'm not sure whether to believe it's as severe as she says, because we just threw a birthday party and she was very much the center of attention for the kids that were able to make it, and well, the limitations of her age.

But when she has mentioned it, she gets very emotional and says something to the effect that her friends don't want to play with her; she's made mention of it a few times.

The problem is, as her father, I've been antisocial my entire life, and her mom's not much of a social butterfly, either. And I feel unequipped and powerless in how to guide her.

Any advice for a way forward would be appreciated more than I could ever convey.

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[–] Zachariah 7 points 1 month ago

Encourage her to get other kids to talk about themselves. Tell her it’s okay to just sit nearby (parallel play). It may take a hike but they’ll probably try to include her eventually (maybe not the same day).

Once she gets interaction, tell her “I don’t like that” (being specific is better, but if you’re emotional, “that” is fine) works way better than “please stop” since it eliminates any power struggle when there’s a disagreement. Other statements like “May I have a turn?” are helpful. Most six year olds understand taking turns if it’s explicitly stated.