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Don't be sorry, your reply actually helped. It's good to know we're not alone dealing with this kind of problem. And you should not feel embarassed, because the "get over it" mentality is toxic as fuck. Having PTSD is not your fault in any way.
Hey @HandOfDoom I answered a phone call today! I was expecting it (hospital stuff) and my pulse went through the roof when I saw it on the screen. All the usual happened, shaking, tears in my eyes, feeling like I was going to throw up. But I answered it - and I don’t think I would have done if you hadn’t have posted about your similar experience. Thank you 😊
That's great! Thanks a lot for sharing this. I'm having a rough day and reading your reply made me smile. I'm happy my post could help you =)
I’m glad it raised a smile, but I’m sorry you’re having a rough day. Is your wife ok?
I was thinking a bit more about the steps I take with my mum so I can answer her calls, and if that could help you. We have a “code” for any phone calls that aren’t scheduled. She assumes I won’t answer so one missed call means she just wants to chat. Two missed calls means she was calling for a specific reason, she needs to speak with me about something but it’s not urgent urgent. Three missed calls means it’s an emergency - she absolutely needs to talk to me asap. She’s very good at not abusing the system so I answer the second call when I see it (my phone still doesn’t ring, even for her). Thankfully there’s only been a handful of true emergencies in 15 years.
I wondered if you and your wife could come up with a similar system - maybe using different messaging apps? Say normal, everyday messages go through WhatsApp but “I’m feeling bad” or “I need help” messages go through SMS. She wouldn’t even need to ask for help, using SMS would be enough to convey the message. Meanwhile you know that any message through WhatsApp is a nice normal (or even boring!) message.
I don’t know how practical that would be or if your wife would be willing to do it, or whether it’d even help, but I thought I’d mention it on the off chance. I’m wishing both of you the best.
Hey, we are feeling better now, thanks for asking :)
We'll try different messaging apps if I can't get better with some more time, that's a good idea. Thanks again and I wish you the best too!