transgender
Welcome to lemmy.ml/c/transgender! This is a community for sharing transgender or gender diverse related news articles, posts, and support for the community.
Rules:
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Bigotry, transphobia, racism, nationalism, and chauvinism are not allowed.
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Selfies are not permitted for the safety of users.
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No surveys or studies.
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Debating transgender rights is not allowed. Transgender rights are human rights. Debating transgender healthcare is not allowed. Transgender healthcare is a necessity.
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No civility policing transgender people. Transgender people have a right to be angry about transphobia and be rude to transphobes.
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If you are cis, do not downvote posts. We don't like you manipulating our community.
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Posts about dysphoria/trauma/transphobia should be NSFW tagged for community health purposes.
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For both cis and trans people: Please alter your username (if possible) to include pronouns (or lack thereof, or questioning) so no one misgenders anyone. details. This rule is important for maintaining a safe place. If you can't change your ID, please let a mod know and include it in your bio.
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Leftist infighting is not allowed.
Please remember to report posts that break any of these rules, it makes our job easier!
If you are looking for a more secure and safe trans space, we suggest you visit https://hexbear.net/c/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns. While we will try our best, lemmy.ml/c/transgender is far more open to the fediverse, and also to trolls. One of the site admins of lemmy.ml, nutomic, is also a transphobe, while hexbear is ran mostly by trans people and has a very active trans community.
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Although I'm a cis woman, I have never felt especially pleased with being lumped into this category. I have never listed my pronouns before, ever, and I avoid listing my gender if possible, because I do not want the first thing people to know about me be my gender and then view me through that lens. I have always appreciated the trans community overlooks my femaleness and sees me instead. In real life daily, to my great displeasure I am lumped into one of two boxes; the internet is a welcome reprieve.
I am not nonbinary, I do not prefer they/them. I go by she/her, but I don't want to advertise this. I have my own struggles with gender, even if I'm ultimately cis, and forcing me to report my gender in my username seems frankly gender essentialist.
I did not choose my pronouns.
What should I write? (none) is wrong, because I can be referred to with pronouns.
(ally) might be nice, except in LGBTIA+, "Ally" implies being straight, and I'm not straight.
How about an empty ()? to indicate I acknowledge the system but opt out personally. Or something cute like (friend), or comrade (but I don't know all the implications of that)
an empty () is completely valid, imo. or even (friend) or (ally) or (any) or something. i definitely would recommend discussing with yor, she could probably help explain why this is a rule, but i get you.
You can be a she/her NB btw. If you feel a disconnect with your gender or don't feel connected to it, you're free to consider yourself trans.
Anyways, I don't see any problem with avoiding pronouns. Personally, I used to be in that camp - I wanted to be supportive of trans people, but I didn't want to list he/him, but didn't think I was trans enough to use other pronouns... So I just did not put them.
This could be interpreted as aro/ace erasure/exclusion btw by putting the word "Ally" so close to the acronym.
Aro/ace are valid and are LGBTIA+. What I mean is, "ally" implies straight, and I'm not.
Gender is a spectrum, and I consider myself cis, even if there are others more cis than me. Most of my troubles with gender come from me feeling society is at fault for treating me differently because of my sex. I think most educated women express such opinions, and that doesn't make us enbies.
Fair. I think it's quite reasonable women hide they're women on the internet given how they are often treated. Just wanted to point out NBies are a wide spectrum and what pronouns you use doesn't need to dictate your gender.
Guess it could it be comparable to being a 1 or 6 on the Kinsey scale and not considering yourself bi because the label doesn't convey any useful information about your attraction? Imo, which label you choose at that point is up to you and I don't think it seems biphobic or NBphobic to choose one of the binary labels.