this post was submitted on 26 Jul 2024
392 points (85.6% liked)

Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Maybe you should stop posting dick pics.

[–] tux7350 6 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Well thanks for getting my hopes up. I went into the profile looking for penis and all I got was cat pics D:<

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Sorry, pussy pics. Mis-typed.

[–] theangryseal 3 points 3 months ago

You’re brilliant. I didn’t see it at first, but I see it now. Would you like a picture of my penis? Actually, I’m just going to send it. Check ur email.

[–] theangryseal 3 points 3 months ago

You wouldn’t want to see an angry seal penis anyway. Or maybe you would? You dodged a bullet. Or maybe you didn’t?

I have the most typical penis. Nothing special. I’ll describe it if you want. Just your average everyday penis. Now you’re curious. I’m sorry.

I’ll describe it.

Tip like a mushroom, shaft like a stem. Balls where the mycelium would normally be, but not buried. Just hanging out above ground. Mostly black hair, a few grays scattered in. A few inches from an asshole with a prominent hemorrhoid scar. Mostly soft, but occasionally not so soft. Has produced more offspring than is typical. Vasectomy incoming.

Hope that helps.

[–] theangryseal 3 points 3 months ago

Hadn’t thought about that.