Asklemmy

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What life hack is so simple yet so effective, you're shocked more people don't know about it? (self.asklemmy)

submitted 4 months ago by return2ozma to c/[email protected]

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[–] [email protected] 188 points 4 months ago (37 children)

Wrestle the pig first, every day. Whatever is your worst, most unpleasant, annoying task for the entire day, do it before you do anything else. It minimizes your stress and worrying and puts it in the rearview mirror.

[–] [email protected] 187 points 4 months ago (1 children)

For a second I thought you were talking about masturbation.

[–] [email protected] 122 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Well yeah crank your hog first of course

[–] [email protected] 32 points 4 months ago (2 children)

SPEAK UP BROTHER, I CANT HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF MY CRANKED HOG

[–] [email protected] 16 points 4 months ago

AROOOOOO

[–] JackFrostNCola 3 points 4 months ago

ABSOLUTELYCRANKINMYMF'INHOG

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fXtn0as91SM

[–] NarrativeBear 27 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (4 children)

Spank the monkey

[–] [email protected] 24 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

Filbert and Heffer playing "Spank the Monkey"

[–] [email protected] 8 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Oh bay bee, oh bay bee, oh bay bee.

Rocko?

Mrs. Bighead?

simultaneous phone slam

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 months ago

There was also that one that was cut from the camping episode.

Rocko is foraging for berries and he grabs one on a bush and the bush recoils and you hear a bear growl. Then a bear jumps out from behind the bush grabbing his crotch and running away in obvious pain.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Flog the dolphin

[–] SuckMyWang 3 points 4 months ago

Mildly to firmly squeeze your penis while moving your hand back and forward

[–] [email protected] 10 points 4 months ago

Choke the chicken.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 months ago

Bash the bishop

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