joeayyy

joined 1 year ago
[–] joeayyy 4 points 1 year ago

Hey Brother, very sorry for your losses. Unfortunately/fortunately, you and I share some similarities.

I work in cloud/tech, in my 30’s, successful, enjoy my job and my father passed two years ago (suicide) and I also modeled my career off of him.

The loss hit me very hard, all I can tell you is what helped me and maybe it will for you but obviously this will be your own journey. I’m in a very happy place now after a lot of work.

I tried to throw myself into work after my father’s death, realized it was making things worse. I took FMLA after being diagnosed with major depression/anxiety, got on anti depressants, started journaling, quit drinking (used it to cope heavily), began therapy, dove heavily into fitness and took up a hobby my father and I shared (golf) to feel a connection to him still.

I used the extended time off to focus on my grief/recovery almost like a job. I had a routine every day, and between all the above mentioned efforts I was able to get a clearer head, understand the path forward, all the while still maintaining a closeness with my father.

I highly recommend taking this very pointed approach to “recovering” from the loss. Trying to live your normal life while processing all of this trauma is just too much, or at least it was for me.

Shoot me a message if this was helpful and you need/want more info. Best of luck.