To the theme of the great escape!
fulcrummed
joined 2 years ago
I cheated. Cheated, cheated, cheated, cheated, cheated… CHEATED!!
And we’re back to
Ahem: “Before his first term. “
Hiding in the toilet, hiding in the footwell of your car, picking your kids up from school (that’s usually just the domesticated ones).
Also, those guys were all brought here to deal with the last invasive species that got outta hand, the deer are gonna need their own predator imported - brown bears should do nicely.
Although there is no apparent change in my patrician facade, I assure you my heart is breaking.
Yes it’s happening this weekend. Bart’s team is playing Lisa’s team - You’re in DIRECT competition with each other!
It’s your child vs my child, the winner will be cheered and showered with praise, the loser will be booed and taunted until my throat is sore!
You can tell cos:
Direct descendent:
If you went entirely the other way it could be a Black Mirror premise…
Image of a “good guy with a gun” trying to stop an active shooter; asking everyone running past him if they have change for a dollar as with increasing urgency, he keeps trying to smooth out and feed a crinkled dollar bill into the machine that keeps spitting out.
Edit: the dystopia flows through me - how bout it becomes subscription based so if you’re on the lowest paid plan you have to watch a 60 second promo spot for season 62 of “Congress Candy Crush Smackdown” or transfer ownership of 10% of your genetic sequence to Disney-Boston Dynamics for their “Real Boy Initiative”, or agree to enable Server mode on your “Nestle Neural Chocolate Chip” to contribute 10% of your brain’s processing power to their distributed “Metabolism Enhancement Network” where subscribers can customise their own metabolic rate, preferred tastes and even allergies.
It becomes SNL adjacent when the shooter also needs to refill on ammo, but he’s not a member for this particular vendor - so his ammo dispense-rate is glacially slow and not without strings attached. He can wait it out and eat a “compliance wafer” per round dispensed, or he can speed it up after “correctly” answering questions about FAANG (after the big 5 companies merged post Project 2025 and effectively took control of the world population and their minds) - he can switch his neuro-wave thought chip to the machine’s provider on the spot, or provide the names and addresses of five dissenters who are unaligned with the values of the one true religion, Capitalism.
I cheated!