I was like that up until recently too. The sudden flashes of a girl I've never seen in the mirror then suddenly seeing my "guy self" again, that kinda stuff. Although I have never really had a beard, my mustache hair was super dark for a long time but has thinned with hrt. Its not super visible now, but still bugs the sugar honey ice tea out of me!
arizz
Can relate, I never really hated the way I looked, but I definitely did not like the way I looked. Just always felt like I was looking at a thing in the mirror, not really myself.
Those days are more or less over for me, hope you feel the same way.
Yeah, I can kinda relate. For me, playing as a girl in games was really one of the few coping mechanisms I had before I started transitioning. Just made me feel correct, y'know? Aside from that pretty much just gender bender anime, couldn't get enough of that stuff.
Weird story, I think I started feeling it after watching a cartoon where a boy and an girl switched bodies for an episode. I would just watch that episode over and over again for a while not understanding why. (I was like maybe 10 in the deep south with no internet, makes sense i wouldn't know what it was)
Aside from that, I guess during puberty I just kinda started feeling a strong desire to wake up a girl, not sure if anything specific set that off just kinda started happening.
- Stop listening to that bitchy creationist teacher, she wants nothing but to brainwash you.
- Stop praying to wake up a girl, Jesus won't save you.
- DO NOT TAKE THAT FAKE HERBAL SHIT ON AMAZON INSTEAD OF HRT, IT DOES NOTHING EXCEPT MAKE YOU DEPRESSED!
i read that as genshin impact at first... looks like I need more caffeine :/