this post was submitted on 27 Jun 2023
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Am I the Asshole?

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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Savings-Basil2035 on 2023-06-27 15:16:21+00:00.


My SIL is very much so the "if there's meds to help, take all of them" type. This ranges from OTC meds to narcotics. The type who tries giving you her prescribed tramadol if you say you have high anxiety that day and gets offended if you say no because she "would never give you anything that would hurt you". I've gotten in to it with her so many times because she thinks I'm ignorant for refusing to take meds if I don't need to. So, needless to say, she's had her kid heavily medicated since she was 5 (she's now 12) for her ADHD and if her kid so much as exhibits a single sign of energy, she's calling the doctor to up the dose because it's "not working anymore".

Now, since our son started school he has been off the walls and getting in to trouble for not sitting still and disrupting class. The school pushed for an evaluation and we agreed to it no issue. But where it was so close to the end of the school year and they kept pushing it out, the evaluation was never completed. We just pushed it out of our heads at this point because it's summer and made the decision to have him evaluated a month or two prior to returning to school so next year he will be all set to go with no issues. But where it is summer, our kids have been hanging out with SILs kid a lot, since the yard is conjoined. SIL has mentioned to me several times that I need to get my son medicated because he's "too much of a handful" and he "needs help". Most of these comments are made following my son screaming through the yards while the kids are playing tag or when he randomly stops what he's doing to start dancing. He does stim a lot so he squawks and randomly starts singing made up songs but it's in no way being over the top disruptive for a mid summer afternoon and it in no way affects anyone other than my SIL. He's just playing.

Well, SIL came here yesterday and said she needed to express a some "tough love" and basically flew off about how we weren't helping our kid because we "refuse" to medicate him and help him regulate his emotions. I simply got up from the table and said "we are done here, you can leave". She kept pushing and she wasn't listening to my husband, who kept telling her to mind her business. So I said "just because you are a medication queen who would rather see your kid doped up rather than handle her does not mean we are those parents. Leave." My MIL called and said I was a "fucking cunt" for bashing my SIL for "doing right by her kid and is trying her best".

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