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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/MMSanFrancisco on 2023-06-23 08:29:22+00:00.
My fiancé had to go into the office today while I was at home, and I was still wrapping up an appointment with a landscaper when a guy arrived to drop off some rugs of my fiancé’s that he had professionally cleaned.
As soon as rug guy had brought the rugs inside and set them down, he presented me with the invoice and asked “Venmo, Zelle or check?”
I didn’t realize I would have to pay for the (very expensive) rug cleaning, but wanted to be helpful and paid the guy via Venmo.
As soon as he left, I saw that my fiancé had called me while I was paying, and I called him right back to tell him I had Venmo’d the guy, would Venmo request him for reimbursement, and the rugs looked great.
His response was to get super pissed and berate me incessantly for paying without asking him if Venmo was the way he wanted to pay. All day long he has continued to chastise me, calling me an “idiot”, “financially irresponsible”, and having “no common sense” because I should have somehow known that he wanted to use his credit card for the points.
I believe that if he wanted to use his credit card, he should have communicated to that to me - he scheduled the drop off himself and told me they would be coming within a certain time window days in advance, so he had plenty of time to let me know his preference.
He believes that the onus is on me, and I should have either A: anticipated that he would want the points and refuse the options the rug guy presented in order to coordinate a way to pay by credit card or B: made the guy wait while I call him and ask him how he wants me to pay.
I’ve said repeatedly that I believe I deserve an apology, and that he can’t be this awful to me (calling me names, continuing all day to reprimand me for not doing what he thought I should do) when he could have simply let me know in advance that he hadn’t paid yet and would want to pay by card, but he refuses to apologize, feels completely justified, and remains so furious at me that he’s sleeping in another room. AITA?