20xx-x-x
Report prepared by Monika
The following document provides an overview of the Imperium's current economic state as of the date mentioned above. Please be aware that the information presented may no longer be accurate in the future.
- Inflation
Hyperinflation has persisted, reaching an unprecedented level of sixteen quadrillion (1.6e16) times. Consequently, the value of Monomarks as a circulating currency has significantly plummeted. Citizens have resorted to alternative uses for Monomarks, such as utilizing them as a substitute for toilet paper due to the exorbitant costs associated with purchasing the actual product, assuming it is still being manufactured. This has created a crisis regarding the worth of the currency itself, as the value of a single bill is now significantly less than the materials used to produce it. One potential solution to alleviate this issue is to introduce trillion-Monomark bills into circulation, thus increasing the face values of individual bills.
- Business
Regrettably, the inflationary pressures currently experienced have resulted in the closure of numerous businesses. Our esteemed Padishah Kaiser recognizes this as an unfortunate consequence of our existing economic policies. However, essential businesses vital to the Imperium's well-being, such as Lockheed-Martin and Microsoft, have received subsidies in the form of gold to ensure their continued provision of equipment and technological advancements required by the Verzweiflungwaffe SS.
- Strikes — a side note
Despite policies implemented to prohibit strikes, the continuous devaluation of our currency has led to an unfortunate wave of strikes within Imperium factories. Fortunately, our robust military has promptly dealt with these movements, effectively preventing any threats to the Imperium's integrity.
In summary, while the current economic conditions raise slight concerns, the critical areas remain stable and secure. Our economists will closely monitor the situation to ensure timely adjustments and interventions as necessary.
Hey, Monika here. if you see this, could you get some extra coffee packets from the agitprop department upstairs after you take this to the executive chambers? We're running a bit low, thanks.
(I wrote this and had chatgpt touch it up for me.)