Recently diagnosed and in my 30s. I've always felt like everybody else have received a user manual that I've never gotten. A user manual on how to be human and how to interact with other humans. It's especially interacting with people that trigger my anxiety. I explained this to my psychologist. Her initial response was that I didn't seem like I had any issues interacting with her, so either that wasn't true or I'm just really good at pretending. Now I'm sitting here, going over what she said, second guessing myself, and I just don't know. This was relatively early on in my session, so I think she understood my anxiety later on. She definitely opened my eyes regarding being more aware of my own needs.
I don't know. Now I just have this nagging feeling of maybe I'm faking my anxiety in regards to socializing.
For me personally, anxiety in social situations often is caused by sensory overstimulation. Background music, multiple people speaking, missing social cues - this adds up and makes me dread larger group settings because I know I will be overwhelmeld at some point. It helps knowing that the group is aware of my issues but I've had my share of outbursts or visits cut short which sucks!
This may be what your psychologist referred to as being aware of your needs? Being aware of when you may need a break or start to become more agitated in a social setting so maybe you can take a break or use earplugs / Loops?