this post was submitted on 12 Jan 2024
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What's to gain?
Being touched by his noodly appendage.
Ramen
And by the power of the sauce, the cheese, and the Holy meatballs.
He who claims His finely powdered Romano cheese smells like feet, may he be stricken.
He who splashes His the holiest of rosé sauce on a white tablecloth, may he be stricken.
He who cuts His holy fettuccine instead of twirling them with a spoon, as the chosen have done, as their forefathers before them, may he be stricken.
R'amen.