weirdway

I was walking around in a park and decided to apply a transformation to my experience when I kept hearing an annoying siren that just wouldn't shut up.

As soon as I decided that, the siren started to get quieter, with some subtle ups and downs in volume, but trending downward in volume. But this wasn't happening fast enough for my liking. So I was then focusing this way and that, and I was adjusting my mentality like this and like that to make it go faster. And then it struck me.

It struck me that the reason I was doing that is because on some level I was still assuming that magick is something objective, and then it was my job to find the one right way to do it. I had to match my activity to something I imagined to be objectively the most effective way of performing a transformation.

Then I realized the idiocy of that belief and I found it funny how I still continued to believe it on some level even though I know better. I'm not even sure I've learned my lesson. It's entirely possible the next time some transformation doesn't work fast enough, I'll be trying to "tune" it, lol. I hope not. At minimum I shouldn't tune anything with the idea that I'm matching what I am doing to some external unbending and eternal standard.