this post was submitted on 13 Dec 2023
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It doesn't and shouldn't be life threatening. It's the feeling of light-headedness that enhances everything else that also surrounds that kink. You're actually not supposed to choke your windpipe but instead squeeze the sides of the neck to slow down but not stop blood flow. If done right and for short amounts of time it shouldn't be life threatening at all. Of course with like everything else there's a lot of people who don't know/don't care about the proper way to do it and end up just chocking their windpipe and stopping their breathing, which is extremely dangerous.
As I state above, I'm already aware of the mechanics.
What I am hoping for is someone sharing what impulse turned a warning sign into a pleasure trigger for them.
In the interest of disclosure, I don't have a choking kink - but I've also been on the internet for nearly three decades at this point so who even knows anymore.
My understanding is that a large part of it is trust. The chokee is quite literally putting their life in someone else's hands and saying, "I trust you enough to do this without killing me." Of course, throw it into casual relationships and it kind of muddies that a little bit - after all, how can you trust someone you just met at a bar/on Tinder/etc. enough to know that they won't kill you? But I think that's where it starts, anyway.
Rape play is the most common kink. You are, after all, an animal with a specific genetic history. Wind back the clock a few centuries and it makes a bit more sense. Thankfully, these days we can do it consentingly. To answer your question, it’s complicated and involves trusting your partner.
I dont see how basic bdsm is a trend. Seems like every generation has a bdsm awakening at some point, everyone gets used to it, forgets about it or continues to play. Then after another 10-15 years it comes back.