this post was submitted on 05 Nov 2023
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Autism

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Any Parents Here? (self.autism)
submitted 1 year ago by Tedrow to c/autism
18 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 

How do you guys deal with parenting? My wife had work events all weekend last week so I had to be on point 100% and then continue to all week. Now this weekend we had a girl scout hike and my wife wanted to go to a special event with me in the evening. I haven't had time for any real solitude for two weeks and am mentally/emotionally drained.

How do you guys deal with this? I feel like a bad parent/partner for not being excited for these things or feelings negative about doing them. Am I expecting too much from myself? I don't know, thanks for reading anyway.

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[โ€“] fluke 29 points 1 year ago (1 children)

You need to take the time to regulate. If you don't then it just ends up in a meltdown at best, and a total shutdown at worst.

And I'm sure everyone would rather you just swerved a social event that deal with that. I know for me, at least, I'm utterly done mentally and emotionally for a couple of days after a shutdown.

I will hopefully assume your wife knows that you're autistic and your needs. Just tell her that you've gone none-stop for two weeks and that you're at critical point for regulation. If you can, might be worth taking sick leave from work.

[โ€“] Tedrow 5 points 1 year ago

That's true, thank you. My wife said as much as well but I always pressure myself into things because I feel like they are important. I need to remember to take care of myself as well. Not easy.