this post was submitted on 21 Oct 2023
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[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (6 children)

I have a job, but who talks to a depressed looking person? And when I'm using my fake happy-mask, there's not much real connection going to be be built.

Worse with forcing myself to be in a place where I don't even have a purpose that I can focus on to distract myself from my despair (and shame).

Thankyou for the response.

[–] Savaran 4 points 1 year ago (4 children)

So part of the coffee shop advice is true. Even if you feel it’s superficial to start. There’s actually a lot to be said for “fake it until you make it” type socialization. Showing up regularly at the same place, be kind to the staff, learn their names, and little by little you’ll find you start recognizing other regulars and the you. It’s okay for connections to start out not super real or deep, it still works those social muscles out. After that it’s just time investment.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (3 children)

No, because, obviously I made it, everyone's believing the story that I built by faking, except myself. I never allowed my true self to be seen

Edit: I'm arguing here, because I need to understand that I made it, I need to speak it, voice it and dare to let my true self be seen since I obviously made it. Get it? If I never hear that I made it, I'll doubt forever that I made it

[–] Savaran 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

The point is this isn’t a quick thing. Go long enough in an environment as a regular and you’ll feel safer and more able to open up.

But if you’re going to argue with the advice provided then why ask?

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