this post was submitted on 11 Aug 2023
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The rise of feminism has seen the steady devaluation of the contribution of men in those areas of society where they should be most active. Rather than celebrate and recognise what's right, the focus is on attacking what's wrong.
The majority of men are lonely, isolated and uncared for. Many feel unvalued, unsafe and vulnerable. There is less community support for men than there has been in the past, less institutional support, and a continued decline in the tolerance of men being in shared places. The minimisation of value in societal roles is yet another way that men are cut off.
This seems to escape the vision of feminism. There is always claim of ideological alignment, where the empowerment of women directly benefits men, but when it comes to any form of concrete action that helps men that need help, or celebrates men that contribute - it's nowhere to be seen.
Men kill themselves. They kill themselves. In their thousands. Leaving cratered families, trauma, guilt from the survivors, many of whom are female. Because they feel valueless, helpless and can't see a purpose to going on.
Accountability goes both ways. In demanding support from men, feminism must support men.
That is an important point. But why it’s unpopular is that it’s not “feminism’s” job to do this. Feminism is a struggle to give women equal opportunities to men. They do not include race, poverty, and definitely not men’s issues in this.
To put it bluntly: It’s not women’s job to fix men.
Men’s loneliness crisis may have come about as a result of modern societal changes. Including equality for women. But it’s men who need to organise and fix that.
(And honestly- as someone who has moved around the western world - this seems uniquely American problem. European men have rich social lives. Even in the most feminist nations)
Is that so? Surely you expect men to help with the goals of feminism, no?
Imagine saying the same thing in reverse: unequal payment for women because they are not forceful enough to push for more? Sad but what can you do - it's not men's job to fix women after all.
If people really think that, then screw this 'f* you, I got mine ' version of feminism and push for a better life for everyone. This is such a shortsighted way to live and not even try to look beyond your own horizon.
Ok fine. I can concede the point that women should help.
But it is not women’s fault that men are lonely. It’s definitely not feminisms fault.
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