this post was submitted on 21 Jan 2025
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[–] qaz 5 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

MySQL wouldn’t win any single event, but would get high scores all around for unknown reasons.

There are a lot of companies running XAMP / LAMP stacks, for some reason.

MongoDB would be at the front desk trying to convince the judges to let it enter, and while doing that would accidentally drop a suitcase filled with business and government secrets.

But haven't you heard? It's webscale!