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I have said yes to a date by mistake. (lemm.ee)

submitted 3 days ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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Met a 22 yo in a group I am involved in, she asked if I wanted a lift to a meeting, there and back. I don't know her very well but she's young a lot younger than me by 10years.

So talking on the way back she mentions antidepressants, I too take anti depressants, the conversation moves towards SSRIs and sex. I panic because that shit makes me supper uncomfortable, she said some stuff that was a blatant hint. Anyway me and her have activity later in the week for the group we're in, she's invited me out for a drink after and being friendly and uncomfortable I said yea sure.

How best to proceed? I don't want things to be weird and our group get weird as a result. I wish I could set boundaries.

Worth mentioning I have crazy anxiety so don't judge too hard I mostly run on auto pilot in those situations.

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

For me I grew up in a hyper sexualized house hold and Catholic too but I now have unhealthy ideas around sex, mostly embarrassment. So when its brought up by someone I have little connection to I go into an almost shut down mode. With sexual partners I have had little to no issue but it does make dating very difficult. I am with her tomorrow and will make it clear that I'm not interested in pursuing a relationship.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I'm not going to tell you how to live your life--I can barely live my own--but is there a specific reason that you aren't interested, other than the fact that she's more comfortable with the idea of sex than you are?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago (2 children)

The reason for my disinterest wasn't her being comfortable with sex, that was just the reason I responded in the affirmative when asked out. She's too young, she's in my political party, also I am in therapy figuring myself out and wouldn't be right to pull someone else through this.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 18 hours ago

she’s in my political party,

Hol' up here, pardner. I dunno about you, but I can't imagine trying to date outside of my political party. I can't even imagine dating someone that's religious or even "spiritual".

[–] TheRealKuni 4 points 1 day ago

also I am in therapy figuring myself out and wouldn't be right to pull someone else through this.

I personally disagree with this reasoning. I used to believe something similar about myself, but it turns out having a partner helped me immensely. I didn’t drag her down, she pulled me up.