this post was submitted on 18 Jul 2023
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A really good friend showed me a personal essay and asked for my honest opinion. She was looking to enter a contest, so I wanted to give her some good feedback to make her writing stand out.

But as it turned out, this was her final draft, and she was really just looking for affirmation that she's a good writer.

The essay needed a lot of work. But when I gave my friend a list of the things that needed to be fixed, she got so upset that she deleted the draft and didn't enter the contest at all. Now I feel terrible.

What should I have done differently? How do you gently break the news to someone that theor writing needs a lot of work?

I do think I was too harsh. But I also didn't want her to enter the contest without having a stellar piece.

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[–] CaspianXI 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

In hindsight, I was too harsh. I was so focused on helping her improve that I forgot to say anything positive.

But that's a good point about stating my genuine intentions to help. I think I tend to be overly critical as part of my personality, and it doesn't really come across that I have good intentions.