this post was submitted on 16 Jul 2023
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Autism
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It's expensive.
I've also seen a few people start to mold their personalities after a diagnosis. They'll start exhibiting stereotypical behaviors that they didn't exhibit before the diagnosis. It might be that they stopped masking, but it's something to be aware of.
I’ve seen this referred to as “skill regression” and can definitely be part of the process of unmasking. It’s like your whole life you’ve been told that you shouldn’t be bothered by the things that bother you and shouldn’t struggle with the things you struggle with. This makes you learn to not trust your own experience or express your needs. You start to assume that what you’re experiencing is what everyone experiences and you just shove all of your discomfort and meltdowns and shutdowns and exhaustion down as best you can, sometimes to the point where you stop being able to notice things like discomfort in your body. When you finally realize what’s going on and start exploring your own experience, it can be overwhelming. You notice all of the small things that affect you and drain you and that are hard for you. It’s really hard to navigate this process, especially if you don’t have access to a therapist to work through these things with. I think this is much, much more common than people just artificially making up autistic traits they have once they get diagnosed or otherwise realize they have ASD.
Yeah I figure there's more going on here so I didn't speculate as to the cause.
Can confirm. Got a 20yo roommate, who before the diagnosis was striving to be better, was trying to learn and figure stuff out. After diagnosis turned into total pain in the ass, blaming everything on the disability, stopped cleaning after himself, kinda gave up on himself in general. I agree, it might be because he stopped masking but it was just sad to see such a change for worse, he took it the wrong way.
OP though sounds like a conscious person, weighing their options, asking for opinion from others. Good job OP!