Asklemmy

44151 readers

1362 users here now

A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions

Search asklemmy 🔍

If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!

Open-ended question
Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
An actual topic of discussion

Looking for support?

Looking for a community?

Lemmyverse: community search
sub.rehab: maps old subreddits to fediverse options, marks official as such
[email protected]: a community for finding communities

~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_[email protected]~

founded 5 years ago

MODERATORS

[email protected]

523

Is it normal for a person to "feel" less as they get older? (lemm.ee)

submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

120 comments fedilink hide all child comments

I remember experiencing the world much more vividly when I was a little boy.

I would step outside on an autumn evening and feel joy as the cool breeze rustled the leaves and caressed my skin. In the summers, I would listen to the orchestra of insects buzzing around me. I would waddle out of the cold swimming pool and the most wonderful shiver would cascade out of me as I peed in the bathroom. In the winters, I would get mesmerized by the simple sound of my boots crunching the snow under me.

These were not experiences that I actively sought out. They just happened. I did not need to stop to smell the figurative roses, the roses themselves would stop me in my tracks.

As I got older, I started feeling less and less and thinking more and more.

I've tried meditation, recreation, vacation, resignation, and medication. Some of these things have helped but I am still left wondering... is this a side effect of getting older? Or is there something wrong with me?

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] Aceticon 22 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

It's do with living in the moment vs spending your time thinking about what you did or worrying about what the future might bring, IMHO.

We become way more prone to spend our time doing things like thinking about stuff we did (and how we miss it if it was good or could've done it better if it was bad) and worrying about what the future can bring (and not necessarily in grand terms: somethingas simple as "I have to get a haircut" which then goes one to "when will I have the time", then "but I need that time for X" and so on) as we grow older.

You absolutelly can still have some moments of wonder (for things as simple as how a cobweb looks with droplets of morning mist on it) but you need to be present there in mind also, not just in body, and not to not let some memory or concern rush in to take your mental attention away from the now.

I had a point in my life with a ton of anxiety and ended up learning Mindfulness (which is simply to try and not say anything to yourself in your mind, which is surprisingly hard to do for more than a few seconds) to stop the feeling (if you're not constantly looking back to something bad or fearing for something bad in the future you don't feel anxious about those things) and as a side effect I ended up with the habit of being more often present in the moment and that's how you just enjoy little wonders when you come across them.

Still, it's nowhere at the level one has as a kid.